Show Me The Meaning.

Day 3 of being home D: Argh, stupid medicine with the stupid making me more sick-ness. Besides that though, I'm all good (H).

So, I guess if I went back and read some of my first blog posts.. I'd see how far I've come.. Maybe I'm going back on my words though.. Because I can distinctly remember saying in one of the first posts I need to make my own happiness. I want to make this work.. I want to do everything in my power to make it work.. I mean, I just feel so much better now.. And obviously people can see that.

I just don't hurt anymore.. And it's an amazing feeling. I mean, for two and half years, I've been in pain.. And now, nothing hurts anymore. And I never thought I'd come this far.. I never thought I'd make it.. But I did. I haven't drawn in what feels like ages. And usually I draw when I feel something I need to express. Negative expression, by the way.

But there's one thing that wont ever change.. I'm always going to be scared. I'm always going to fear change, and loss.. But right now my fear isn't effecting me as much as it used to. Maybe I have changed.. Maybe it's the fact that I know now that there's always going to be a tomorrow.. There will always be something out there, something to pick us up when we've fallen down.. You just have to find it. And yeah, life gets hard. But somedays.. Life gets great. And those are the days you need to live for.

At the beginning of the year, I just wanted to let go of everything. I wanted to look in the mirror and say that "my name is Sarah, and I have something to live for". I can do that right now, because I will always have something to live for.. I live for myself.. I am enough cause to keep on living. Somedays I might forget that.. Because yeah, somedays might be hard. But I have a belief, that no matter what happens.. I'll make it through. I've shown myself that.

I just needed a little help in realising that..
For a full list of those who helped me, visit my newest myspace blog (: